I like to call it: “Surfing the waves of uncertainty with grace and perseverance.”
Let’s say you’re going along just fine and suddenly, out of nowhere, somebody says or does something – or an errant thought grabs you – and you are triggered! Strong emotions such as anxiety or anger begin shooting through you.
Will they take over, sucking you into an inward gloomy silence or push outward with distressing physical sensations and causing you regrettable outbursts?
What you do next is vital – for your own well-being and those around you. You might continue to let the emotion consume you or you learn to stay present with what’s coming up so you can process and release the feelings and get back to calmness.
Rescuing Ourselves – Nobody Else Can
The art comes in not trying to suppress the emotional energy – but learning the skill to let that yucky energy move through you so it can be released and you can get back to a better place.
In emotional inquiry, self-awareness is the key factor. The skill is training yourself to pay attention to the emotions that surface, the thoughts that go with them, and the physical sensations. Of course, all of this can be unpleasant in the early stages because we don’t want to be present with those emotions. But the pay-off is no longer being a slave to them.
How to Cultivate Self-Awareness
The key to cultivating self-awareness is becoming sensitive to observing your emotions. The way to do this is through meditation. Before you roll your eyes and dismiss it with “I don’t like to meditate!” know there’s another approach besides sitting in silence.
Try out the “Unmeditation” Meditation
I call it the “unmeditation” meditation – it respects the fact that traditional mindfulness meditation can be challenging for people who wrestle with incessant pounding thoughts. I invite you to give it a try by going to beccawilliams.org/awareness/
Becca Williams is an emotions therapist and clinician who helps people free themselves from emotional burdens, traumas, and limiting beliefs to live more fulfilling lives.
